New Relationship in Spring 2020?
New Relationship in Spring 2020?
For those of you who are just starting a new relationship during this time, or are already in a relationship that has unexpectedly become long distance, we’ve got some ideas to help you stay connected with your partner(s)! Not to worry, they are all social distancing approved 😉
Thoughtful gestures
Playful playlists- Music can be a great tool for connecting with others, getting our bodies moving, boosting our moods, and processing our emotions during difficult times. Make your partner a playlist full of your favorite songs, the songs you like to listen to together, or of your favorite 90’s hits! You can craft playlists on any music streaming service, or you can go old school and burn them a CD!
Love notes and care packages- The feeling of receiving a snail mail letter is, in my opinion, unmatched. Send your honey a sweet note, a funny story, or an original poem, and it will surely put a smile on their face! If you are feeling like a note isn’t enough, send a care package. Get creative and fill it with all of the COVID essentials like toilet paper and cookies!
Gratitude calls- Let your partner know that you appreciate them and are thinking about them! Pick up the phone with the intention of telling your partner something you admire about them or are grateful for. “I am so thankful for the effort you are putting into this relationship to maintain the connection while we are apart! I feel so lucky to have such a dedicated and creative partner!”
Distance dates
Movie magic- You know that movie you’ve been talking about watching for months? Now is the time! Pick a movie with your partner, or surprise them with one of your all time favorites. You can use a service like Netflix Party, that is designed specifically for long distance viewing, or you can push play at the same time and have a video chat going throughout the movie.
Recipe swap- Miss the feeling of cooking meals together? Swap recipes with your partner and cook dinner together over video chat! Send them a childhood favorite or test out a new dish for taco Tuesday. Sit down and eat the meal together when it’s done and pretend to be prestigious food critics who are giving a highly anticipated review.
Virtual game night- Spend a night unleashing your inner competitor! There are tons of online games and apps that allow you to play remotely with other people. Some apps cost a few dollars, but lots of games are free. You can play classic favorites like Life, Clue, Scattergories, and Settlers of Catan, or try something brand new. Winner gets to pick the next game!
Instagram live concert or comedy show- Technology is amazing! Even though in-person events have been cancelled or postponed, a lot of performers are moving to social media to provide free content for their supporters. Musicians like John Legend, Lady Gaga, and Chris Martin of Coldplay have all live streamed performances from their homes. Get creative and find your favorite authors, comedians, actors, and podcasters on social media and see if they are doing anything special during this time. Watch it with your partner(s) and talk about the highlights after!
Separate, but steamy
Phone sex- A classic way to play with your partner. Sound can be a key component of arousal. It’s easier than you think, even for folks who aren’t “dirty talk” fans. Being silly and having a sense of humor is a key addition (this is about being PLAYFUL!) Here’s a step by step guide:
- Dress the part and get in the mood.
- Say what you are wearing and where you are.
- Say what you want to do to your partner(s).
- Say how that would feel in your body.
- Repeat this — back and forth — as long as you want.
- Talk about it afterwards.
Old fashioned sexting- Tired of being on your phone all day, but are still looking to spice things up with your partner? Try a sexy boudoir shoot with the assistance of the self timer function on your phone or camera. Print out some pictures and write a sexy note or story to go with them before sending them off in the mail.
Virtual sex parties- If you miss in-person play parties, or have always wanted to attend one, but have been apprehensive, now is your time! Step out of your comfort zone in the comfort of your own room. Several individuals and sex positive groups are hosting play parties online. Please know that any reputable play party will begin with a discussion of boundaries and group agreements. You will never be made to do anything you are not comfortable with, and have the option to exit at any point. There is a lot of variety at these parties, and it can be a great way to explore with your partner, meet new people, and become a part of an awesome community.
Explore your fantasies together- Even though we are physically distanced from each other, this is a great time to grow closer with your partner(s) in the bedroom. Sharing your fantasies and desires can be a great way to expand your sexual relationship with a partner. Suggest a sexy movie (or other forms of steamy content) swap with your lover, and send them something that depicts your deepest desires. If this feels like a scary step, try the XConfessions app. A free app that lets you create separate accounts with your partner and has you swipe “yes” or “no” on different sexual scenarios and fantasies. When you are done swiping, it will only show you the sexy cards you both said yes to.
Let us know the creative ways that you have been staying connected with your partner(s)!
RCSW is still offering services through secure video and phone appointments. Contact us at 585-865-3584 or info@rochestercenterforsexualwellness.com for appointment information.
